That's what I will forever call this highest of highs to lowest of lows roller coaster I ride. Sometimes your world crumbles in 30 seconds. That little drop from the highest point happens so fast that you lose your stomach. Can't eat. You're so scared. You can't breathe. Can't talk. Everyone that talks to you makes it worse. You just need to get to the bottom so you can be sure there's nowhere to go but up. I just don't like it. I don't like it at all. I want my stomach back. I want my breath back. I want a band aid for my heart and an alarm clock for my soul to stay on track.
I love my dad. I love my grandpa. Without them I wouldn't have had a hand to hold on the ride down or a pillow to cushion my fall.
Now as I lay here at the bottom and everything in the world lands on me crushing me further I close my eyes. I can't sleep, I can't turn off my brain. But the ride doesn't stay at the bottom forever. You just have to wait until the line's short enough to ride again.
